Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Lazy parenting

I am a lazy parent.
I say this with much regard for myself and respect for my children. I am a lazy parent.

If you were to hear me say this you may think that I leave my kids run wild with no guidance, or maybe I just hand over all responsibility to someone else. This is not the case. I love my children and guide and support them daily. I am always there to catch them if they fall. But I will leave them fall so that they can learn for themselves. I do not deny them their opportunity to learn from their world. And this is why I consider myself a "lazy parent".

I will not create a situation for my children that makes them feel like they are being pushed to do something they would rather not do or are just not yet ready for. I will not make it harder for myself. I will leave them choose their sense of responsibility.

If my child is not ready yet to walk on its own I will not force it by using a walker. This means I will have to pay extra "unnecessary" attention too soon for the safety of my child.
I will prefer to carry my child and avoid the need to cry. I will change, burp, and listen to their cues so as I avoid a cranky overstressed screaming baby which is much more difficult to care for.
I will offer them my breast if they fall and hurt themselves.
I prefer to bed-share so that I can avoid waking up completely and having to leave the warmth of my bed to feed or change them when they need it.
We co-sleep with the older kids just to avoid having to wake up and check on them during the night. We can just open one eye and see everything is well.
I shower with all my children, at the same time! I refuse to bath each one separate, too much time too much water and too much work! Bathing together I can properly teach them by example correct hygiene. And they learn why girl and boys are different, the way God made them.
I will wash only what is necessary for the week.
I will cook large meals and reheat the leftovers the next day.
I will make my own baby food just to avoid leaving the house to shop.
I breastfeed to avoid having bottles that need to be washed and sterilized on a regular basis, not to mention avoid having to boil water and make the formula. 
I will leave my children to their imaginations in our back yard.

I am too lazy by trait to do anything that would make my life harder and more stressed and inhibit the time I could spend bonding and shaping my children into the adults they will grow into. I am lazy, but this does not mean that I have clingy, unsure children. Each has his/her own character and knows what they want and will do what is necessary to achieve it. They have developed a sense of self worth because of my lazy parenting. They can feed them selves and feed me too. They know how to assort the laundry and clean. They are little, strong, dependable people who know where they are in this world. They have no doubt that we will always be there for them and they are secure self reliant beings. 

This is my parenting style: lazy.